(Source: missilee)

(Source: ma-demoiselle-cherie)

in the shower

me: that's not quite hot enough let me just turn it up to boiling lava.
me: yes good i shall bathe in the waters of mordor.
me: why do we have like 25 different kinds of shampoo?
me: i'ma read the back of this.
me: lather, rinse, repeat?
me: why do i have to repeat is your product so shitty it didn't work the first time?
me: hold the fuck up i have to write fanfic in my head real quick.
me: if water is a renewable resource does that mean every celebrity i've ever loved has showered in this same water before?
me: eheheheheheheheheheh.
me: but you didn't have to cUT ME OFF.
me: did i already wash my hair?
me: i think i did but i don't remember.
me: i'ma do it again.
me: FUCK I REPEATED.
me: well played, pantene pro-v. WELL PLAYED
me: i wonder what it's like to have sex in the shower.
me: i bet it's awkward.
me: i bet a lot of injuries happen that way.
me: okay time to get out.
me:
me:
me: where the fuck is my towel.

everything-relatable:

Want more personal/relatable?

darlingimwaiting:

helloopandee:

homosexualotter:

moosesmeeses:

Someone tied a balloon to a dead pigeon.

Help I can’t stop laughing.

I wasn’t going to reblog

But then I saw what the balloon said

omg why am i laughing

thefunniestpost:

Hysterical Blog!

strikeraider:

deathviashowerskanking:

stopandsmellthedata:

ensanguinedbirdy:

thefandomlyfe:

justlaughit-off:

fancyrussiansushi:

heyitspj:

scuzzmutt:

what is the purpose of training bras??? what are we trying to teach the boobs

they are trained to be the very breast

like no one ever bras

to catch them is my real chest

to train them are my tata’s

I will browse across the store

Trying on every size

Need training bras to understand

THE MAMMARIES INSIDE